I filled my car with gas this morning. I thought you might like to know how that went………

9:02: Carefully pulled up toward the pump – price per gallon (ppg) was $4.09.

9:02: Slowed to let a pregnant woman cross in front of me first – ppg now $4.19. Damn Good Samaritan complex!

9:03: Got up to the pump. Took a sip of my coffee first – ppg now $4.29. Damn caffeine habit!

9:04: Forgot which side the gas cap was on. That cost me – ppg now $4.39. Damn senior moments!

9:05: Picked my blend and inserted my card, but not fast enough – ppg now  $4.49. Damn arthritis!

9:06: Finally got to pumping. By three gallons in, the ppg was at $4.59. Damn slow pumps!

9:09: Still only 9 gallons pumped. Guy at pump next to me went in to use restroom while his gas pumped. Thought of using his pump to fill my car but didn’t  – ppg now $4.79. Damn conscience!

9:14: Finally finished pumping 12 ½ gallons – ppg now hovering around $5.00. Just plain DAMN!

9:15: Said a prayer of thanks that I wasn’t the guy in the Chevy Suburban.

9:16: Moved car away from pump, locked it.

9:17: Walked home. Don’t need car ’til tomorrow morning.

9:40: Wrote thank you note to Joe.

Used my literary license a bit here, but is there even one of you who doesn’t think this scenario is a real possibility in the future?

Editor’s Note: It seems a bit incongruous to be writing a sarcastic blog complaining about this while people in the Ukraine are suffering so horrendously. But as the saying goes, “pain is relative.” Not to mention, a good anecdote makes a better antidote, especially in these anxious times.