Spam update……

In keeping with my policy of always answering every spam comment, I submit the following.  By the way, I seem to be getting less spam lately. You don’t think it’s because of my sarcastic replies do you? Naaaaahhhh….

1. From: Waldo Biddick

” I simply want to tell you that I am beginner to blogs and truly liked you’re web blog. Probably I’m want to bookmark your website . You amazingly come with really good articles. Kudos for sharing with us your web page.”

My reply:

Dear Waldo, First let me say how glad I am that someone finally found you. I’m guessing that the fact that you have “opium” in your web address explains why you were hiding in the first place. I simply want to tell you that you definitely are a beginner. I am sorry to report that I am not actually a web blog but a real live person…..oh, you meant your web blog. Sorry. You sound painfully undecided about bookmarking my site as you state: “Probably I’m want to“. Here’s a thought; Pleeezze don’t bookmark it! And to clear up your misconception, I do not come free with my articles, amazingly or otherwise. If you want to hire me for writing blogs, my rate is $100/hr plus expenses. Warning: I drink a lot of wine while writing, so expenses are a large portion of the cost. Lastly, I appreciate that you appreciate my sharing my blog but if I didn’t, I wouldn’t be a blogger would I? Hmmmmm……?

2. From:

“I’m now not certain the place you are getting your information, but great topic. I needs to spend a while learning more or working out more. Thank you for fantastic info I used to be searching for this information for my mission.”

My reply:

Dear Staires, I’m sorry you’re no longer certain of where I get my information, but if it makes you feel any better, that makes two of us. As for the choices in your second point, while I expect all my readers to be “buff”, I suggest you choose the former. It’s obvious you needs to be learning more. Lastly, your mission, should you choose to accept it, will be to never visit my blog again. This reply will self-destruct in 10 seconds, 9, 8, 7……